There’s a space in my chest where I feel the absence of my heart – that was torn out by you. The space is small and insignificant; trivial, worthless; like my feelings were to you.

It wasn’t always like that; my heart. It was big once… big, and full of love for you. Until that day, when I saw the truth behind the lies that were a part of you.

Now I know I was nothing more than a puppet to the devil residing in you.


C. J. was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder when she was sixteen years old, after a manic episode necessitated her admittance to a local clinic.

Her struggle with Bipolar has been challenging, but she attributes her survival to (among other things) her God-given gifts; finding solace in journaling, poetry, story writing, art and music. She is a self-professed chocoholic and coffee addict, and usually delights in both at the same time.

She aspires to one day publish an anthology of her many poems, as well as a memoir of her personal struggles with depression and living with Bipolar Disorder.


© C. J. Spammer


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